Skip to main content

#deepdowninside

"#deepdowninside: I want to be different." "#deepdowninside: I want to be stronger, I want to be taller, I want to be lighter, shorter, thinner, fatter","deepdowninside: I want him/her to like me", "#deepdowninside: I don't want to be here".....These are not my desires. Neither are they the desires of any particular person....I borrowed the hashtag from twitter just so that I can write about what we really want. The desires we keep to ourselves, sometimes out of fear, sometimes because we know that if we do want we want we may disturb the balance of karma or some higher power. The things we want to do but don't because we know we may hurt those closest to us with our single mindedness as one might if one was finally allowed to do the things they deeply desire.
Thanks to my twit family I was privy to a sample of the things we want deep down inside and I realised that we all want basically the same things, even though everytime, the actions that lead us to our goals differ. We all crave acceptance, we all want to be successful in our chosen careers, we all want to be different. We want to love and be loved. We want to let go of our protective sheilds and be free. We want the freedom that is found in true happiness, for only then can we be truly free to dream.
#deepdowninside we want money.Tons of it,but without looking like that was the main goal. So we try to cover it up with words like achievement and fulfilment. #deepdowninside we want to have sex whenever and with whomever and not be called to task for it. #deepdowninside we detest responsibility for the pressure but crave it for the acceptance. #deepdowninside we want to do the things we want not out of reason but out of passion. Sometimes we scoff at creativity but inwardly we crave it. We want the glamour and recognition but outwardly strive to look unconcerned by it.#deepdowninside we want our partners to be wealthy and humble. Caring but firm.
I won't say what I want deepdowninside. But I can tell you about the things that inspire me and perhaps you might deduce from them the desires of my heart.I am inspired by music,by the stories that it tells,its truths and its lies. I am inspired by colour. Its ability to change my mood in a second. I am inspired by fabric and texture's ability to lend an eye to fashion. I am inspired by rainfall the freshness and newness it brings. I am inspired by laughter for in that I find my freedom. I am inspired by toil. For the hope and faith it preaches.I am inspired by friendship. Yours. I am inspired by passion.yes that one. The mindlessness and the moments of intense clarity. This is my passion, my addiction. This is my inspiration and my celebration.

"#deepdoninside:I wnt 2 create things dt are gorgeous & functional without any restrictions", "#deepdoninside:I want a glove, and a straw... And white shoes. And a baby. Dont know why.", "#deepdowninside:I just want to be free."

#nowplaying: 'Breakaway" ~ Kelly Clarkson

Comments

Daydah said…
Deep...its gone deep down inside o' me. Thanks for the post. Found you via twitter - one of my tweople read your post over 6 times!
Babs said…
Hey! I see my deepdowninside
Jayla. said…
Nice piece luv, right now my deepdowninside is confused as hell :)
Nee Fe Mi said…
i like this _ u def hit the mark
Sisem E. Naidem said…
#deepdowninside I always knew you were this good at writing. And you never disappoint me with each post...

Popular posts from this blog

~Boycott Love..........~

~I'm coming apart at the seams, pitching myself for leads in other people's dreams, now buzz, buzz, buzz, doc there's a hole where something was, doc there's a hole where something was...~ Those are the opening lines of 'Disloyal order of Water Buffaloes', an amazing song by Fall Out Boy. By now you must know that I love FOB. that being said, those lines are so hauntingly beautiful and have for the past few weeks been the summation of my state of mind, amongst other things... However, seeing as this is my blog of light and happiness, i wont talk about those feelings here. Instead, i'll quote a line from the song and tell you what I think. This sorta feels like Harry Essang's lit class. Anyways.... "I promise you anything for another shot at life,imperfect boys with their perfect lives, nobody wants to hear you sing about tragedy" I understand the feeling of desperation, when you' give anything to have just one thing back. even for a

Things we lost in the fire of life : someone like you

Sometimes it lasts in love... but sometimes it hurts instead. Yesterday was an ex's birthday. I was sweeping my room and when i took a break to check my bbm contacts' updtes, i saw "happy birthday king B" and for a second, i could not remember who that was neither could i associate March 26 to anyone who I may have known in my entire life. Until like all things which eventually come to light, i sat back faily startled. Of course it was his birthday. I went back to sweeping and the phrase "things we lost in the fire of life" came to me. You see, two years ago i would have made a production out of that date...now i couldnt even remember it. This touched me a great deal, especially as i sat down and began to wonder how many of such dates had been forgotten, at one time so precious. How many memories have been banished to the utterly deep, dark cesspool that is my mind? Consciously in an attempt to move on or like imprints in sand, gently erased by the passage

Letter to My Future

First things first, lets cut out the bs of "let's see what the future brings". How about I tell you exactly what I want. Agreed? I'd prolly preamble first. But i know you'll understand. When I was in uni, there's was this guy who called a certain girl his future. I found it incredibly silly at the time. Especially in that context. I don't anymore. Amidst all the upheaval that is my life at the moment, I have seen that supposedly calm eye of a storm. That silent part of a tornado where there is wonder at the havoc nature can cause. I have seen that split second before a head on collision, the certainty, the wonder. I have seen that second, just before bullet bites into skin. The second before an orgasm. Those times when everything apart from that moment is completely irrelevant. When all you see is colour and .......life. *insert quiet smile here*. I digress? Pull me back please...or maybe not. Dear Abimbola, Sometime soon, perhaps in every second af