Thursday, June 2, 2011

The Replacements don't fit

I've always believed that there's just one person for each of us. That
one soulmate. Yin to your Yang. Only one person that will ever
complete u so perfectly. One true love. And I've also always believed
that everyone will meet that person at one point in their lives. And
with that person, you only get one shot at it. But I've also always
believed that sometimes it may work out and other times it won't. But
that does not make it any less true.

I've also always believed that before and after that one person there
would be others. Mirages if you like. Mirrors but not exactly mirror
images. And out of all of that we pick one. And it works out. But most
times you never forget.

Its been 8months since we split up. And yes I have moved on and I'm
happy and restored, but I yearn for him. Not in my body as with a
lover's touch, but in my soul. There's many things I'd like to share
with him cos I know he'd understand. Many questions I'd like to ask,
his smiles I'd like to see. Yes. This is a post about longing and I am
writing this because the replacements don't fit.

In these 8 months I've had people come and go and inasmuch as I don't
expect them to be him, they are how should I say..."Not werking for
me". I am not looking for his replacement in the physical form. I am
searching for his smile, and the light in his eyes. I am searching for
his embrace, and the pattern of his breathing. I am searching for a
spark...something. Anything like him.

Yesterday I added him on my bb. And just seeing his name there,
without speaking, quelled all the crying, all the longing and all the
anxiety I've been feeling. And for the first time in so long, I've
woken at peace with myself and the world around me. And the
realisation that surely, all will be well.

So out of the 6billion plus people in the world, all I need is one.
And if that don't work, all I need is a replacement that fits.

Sent from my mobile device


Sisi Yemmie ™ said...

sometimes it takes really long to move on....

Declectic said...

I hope you find that replacement boo, almost clocking 2years and I glimpse snipets of him in others and that just makes me feel incomplete. Right now I'm just hoping that God gives me a spark in a completely different direction. I have however resigned myself to knowing that I gave up part of me to imbibe part of him and I can never switch that around. We still talk everyday!

Ms Dang said...

I know how you feel dear.

leggy said...

i do not think that there is a soulmate for everyone or that one person for everybody. i dont think that thats even feasible considering the ratio of men to women in the world but i do think that we meet someone that is compatible to us and we are really attracted to and have good sexual chemistry with and we convince ourselves that they are our soulmates to make the procreation process easier on everyone all around.

that said: hope you feel better and stop think that you are looking for replacements. going by your theory, if it did not work out then surely he wasn't your soulmate. arent soulmates supposed to be together despite all odds?!

Blessing said...

:) *currently feeling ur pain*

neefemi said...

currently in the same boat

Onome said...

sweetie, Its either you try to get back with him or let him go totally. The more you hold on to his smiles, and all that, the longer it will take you to find a "replacement". I was like that too, 3 years ago, but i finally moved on and gave someone else a chance and im happily married now, 15 months and counting. So its either you guys work it out or u block him out totally. It IS very hard, i know but you cant continue like this. Stop searching for another 'him' - when you meet someone else try to get to know them without comparing them to him. If yall cant work it out then please let it go.