Friday, June 24, 2011

Boom boom boom boom #Superbass

Something about good music that lifts you and lets you fly. I've been listening to Nicki Minaj's Superbass for a few days now and its totally put a smile on my face. Not just a smile. In the words of KidKonnect, a "huge ass grin". I was in the shower this morning when I realised that I was grinning and there was no particular reason for the huge smile that was stretched across my face. I am happy I guess content too. Not complacent though. Never that. Just in a really good place. And that's a really good thing, considering.

I was having Biodun cravings the other day. So I went to the gym instead of phoning him. Let just say it was a very effective solution. Three days later my body hurts too much to sit properly, not to mention trying to cry.

I read ThirdWorldProfashional and there was a thingy bob about taking a photo of all the contents of your bag. I was gonna do that today. But way too many "weird" stuff in my handbag.

I hate the fact that my feet are size 42. I think that's the only part of my body I don't dig. Amazing shoes in the Gucci sale. But they are all around size 39. But then again, thinking off all the people without feet...I love mine just as is.

Read something about Illegal Immigrants on Myne's blog and it reminded me about being bounced at the American Embassy. I won't lie, that "ela" was painful. I was gonna scream at the dude through the glass and go "wtf! Do I look like I'd like to inconvenience myself one bit by running away to ur fucking country? I just wanna go on holiday you freaking mutant" But then I's not your fault. It's Nigerian's I blame. It's even so bad that they now bounce people at the South African embassy. The American dream? I've never had it. I've had the English one though. More fun if you ask me.

It feels like I'm in love. Which is weird because I'm not exactly seeing anyone at the moment. And when I say "exactly" I mean I'm going on dates with a bunch of people but not exactly.

My staff (read as junior at work) paid me a really lovely compliment today. Apparently I'm fantastic to work with. Unless of course I show you my red eye. Then I can be a total winch. Vraiment.

About commenting on blogs, I'm really terrible at it. I read o! But sometimes it feels like any comment I make would be like stating the obvious. Do you get? And responding to comments on my people really go back to read comments? It's not exactly bitchfighting on Bella Naija.

Did I ever mention that I met T-Notes in December? I was the girl in leggings? Cream coat? Kiss kiss T.

I'm going out with my girls tonight. Cheap booze and good food is the theme. Good clean fun. So if you're out tonight (not clubbing), holla at this girl.

Np: Superbass – Nicki Minaj

Have a Superbass weekend.


Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

Monday, June 13, 2011

Believing the promise

Here I stand, before God, Expectant. I chose to believe his promises made to me instead of the performance of those promises. Because. Afterall, he is not man that He should lie.

Here I stand, before God, flawed in so many ways. Sinner, sometimes unrepentant. But I choose to humble myself before Him and admit that I have no power of my own.

Here I stand, before God, in worship. My eyes have seen the King, the Lamb upon the throne. He reigns forever.

Here I stand, before God, in silence. How can I hear what he has to say if I can't keep the turmoil in my heart and in my mind out of the way?

Here I am, before God, believing that my sins are forgiven, that I have help, that my worship is acceptable and that I can hear what He's saying to me.

"Come child, let us walk on water."

Have a blessed week.

Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

Friday, June 10, 2011

Of rainy days....(Flashbacks)

Dancing in circles with friends in rain, missed lecture because of this.

Rainy Saturday afternoon designing wedding gowns and fantasizing about my dream wedding and building castles in the air. 14 and free from secondary school. From here on to conquer the world.

Rainy Friday afternoon hunched over my desk at overdosing on The Fray, trading OTH quotes and music with soon to be boyfriend who later became ex-boyfriend. I miss carefree. Or maybe I've never been carefree?

Rainy Friday evening driving to Paddy's, tears streaming down my face. Seeking comfort.

On B's bed, in B's arms. Both listening to rainfall outside the window and whispering. Now I wonder why we were whispering…perhaps subconsciously trying not to break what we knew was fragile. Too precious this memory. Tranquillity.

On B's bed. B snoring beside me. Laptop open in front of me, writing one of my best posts till date. Stand up from bed to stare outside the window. Its so peaceful. I long to put my hand outside window to touch rain. Crawl back into bed and try to crawl into B. Time was running out.

In parking lot at work, seat reclined, rain hitting roof, listening to M.I's "Forever". Bliss

Reading Calais in patio. Weather cold from rain falling outside. Restoring self, leaving world behind and entering mind. Looking for self lost along the way. Oldest I've ever been at this point.

Lost in London. Took walk and just kept walking. Funny late autumn light rain. No coat, 10pounds and oyster in pocket. Left mobile at home. Journeys to nowhere.

Woke up middle of night. Patio door flung wide open cos forgot to lock it earlier. Heavy winds promising rain. Went to patio and cried eyes out. There is where mother found me. First step to healing.

Standing at window last week. Rain outside window. Not heavy, not drizzle. Just right. Like me. Contemplating future. Heart awash with plans. Finding self again.

It is well with me. It is well with you.

P.s. you may wonder about some of the tenses in this post. Do not fear, I haven't entirely forgotten how to speak English. Is just darned Irish novel.

Much Love,

Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

Tuesdays' thoughts for a very random Friday

~Have u ever tried to do an upward facing waka? That shit is hard I tell u. Plain impossible. I tried to waka a trailer driver today. The guy thought I was begging. No greater injustice has ever been delivered to a waka~

~Something abt keke marwas that make me go arrrrrrrrghhhh....inside my head I'm wondering if I look like the bbm angry smiley when I do that. maybe a little less red~

~So that contraption at adeniji is a billboard type thing. If I tell u what I thought it was you'd shake ur head~

~I said lol...well I went l-o-l. Frankly ive been spending too much time trying to put an end to boring bbm convos~

~Being pursued(I mean this literarily) by a hunk In traffic does wonders. for ones ego. That is of course until follows u into 45mins worth of traffic and when ure about to kill urself with anticipation he comes down from his car and u find that he's. At least 3inches shorter. In Flats!!! #truestory

~Almost-disgusting thought next~

~If someone shoved cocaine up their asshole would it make anal sex any less...well for lack of a better word, anal~

~And talking about shoving things up assholes. Tones of people are secretly asshole fetish..."Oh whatever, up urs" or "shove this where the sun don't shine" and blah blah blah...u get~

~Have u seen the new Kia Jeep? I'd like to do 'it' inside that car. Well there's no such thing as a kia jeep seeing as jeep is a brand name and unless they tried to make a car together...smartass. Doesn't sit well on me~

~U know that thing they do in movies where the bad guy is on a power bike and someone opens a car door and the guy hits it and flies ...(Read powerbikes as bicycle), I had a maddening urge to do that this morning~

~Been reading a lot lately. I feel like I'm getting my life back. The thing about books is that they the set me off in all sorts of directions. Sorta like a continuum(I really don't know what this word means). Anyways, A Part of the Whole has sent me to Plato and his other cronies, This charming man has sent me to the map of ireland and has gifted me with a new vocab. Well just a few words when u hear me say "rozzers" , I mean police..u feel me yah?~

~Glo billboard on falomo bridge with that nollywood chic. Tsk tsk. They should have at least tried to remove the zits on her forehead~

~I love champagne. I really do. Especially when random man at club says "what are u drinking pretty girl? Pretty girls should drink Dom P." And when random man orders Dom P~

~there's just something wrong with that coca cola ad on akin adesola. Wtf is the guy smelling his armpits!!!~

~have u been to capetown? You should go. 4days eez enuff lest u become alcoholic and refuse to come back home. Is beyootiful beyootiful drinking paradise. And all that seafood...err...did I mention the drinkies (another irish book something)~

~if u could spend a day as the opposite sex, what would u wanna do? Please don't say "pee standing up" or "fix a weave" or any other brain damaging boring activity~

Oh and its friday. Here's to the weekend!*clinks bb against airwick bottle*

Much Love,
Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

Thursday, June 2, 2011

The Replacements don't fit

I've always believed that there's just one person for each of us. That
one soulmate. Yin to your Yang. Only one person that will ever
complete u so perfectly. One true love. And I've also always believed
that everyone will meet that person at one point in their lives. And
with that person, you only get one shot at it. But I've also always
believed that sometimes it may work out and other times it won't. But
that does not make it any less true.

I've also always believed that before and after that one person there
would be others. Mirages if you like. Mirrors but not exactly mirror
images. And out of all of that we pick one. And it works out. But most
times you never forget.

Its been 8months since we split up. And yes I have moved on and I'm
happy and restored, but I yearn for him. Not in my body as with a
lover's touch, but in my soul. There's many things I'd like to share
with him cos I know he'd understand. Many questions I'd like to ask,
his smiles I'd like to see. Yes. This is a post about longing and I am
writing this because the replacements don't fit.

In these 8 months I've had people come and go and inasmuch as I don't
expect them to be him, they are how should I say..."Not werking for
me". I am not looking for his replacement in the physical form. I am
searching for his smile, and the light in his eyes. I am searching for
his embrace, and the pattern of his breathing. I am searching for a
spark...something. Anything like him.

Yesterday I added him on my bb. And just seeing his name there,
without speaking, quelled all the crying, all the longing and all the
anxiety I've been feeling. And for the first time in so long, I've
woken at peace with myself and the world around me. And the
realisation that surely, all will be well.

So out of the 6billion plus people in the world, all I need is one.
And if that don't work, all I need is a replacement that fits.

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