I'll Be There

Its been just over a year since Mikey passed. I wanted to write this post that day, but I couldnt. So i'm writing it now. I am remembering Michael Jackson.

What do you see in your mind when you think of MJ? Does he cross your mind as he does mine? And if he does, what do you think? What words would you associate with him? .....I remember the day he died. I fell slightly ill, especially after I'd driven in the rain (1 hour traffic on awolowo road), with my windows down and my car stereo on full blast playing MJ's music. Letting the world know in case they didnt. Mikey was gone from here. Freed from his anguish and his pain. From judging and prying eyes and those who sought to profit from every move he ever made.

I dont remember when I first fell in love with MJ. When he smiled at me through the telly and in my child's heart i decided that I'll always love this man. His music preaching love and compassion. All through the years, with every single seemingly bizarre act, it was always MJ. MJ I wanted to protect.

As humans we are quick to pass judgements on thinks we dont understand especially in an attempt to convince ourselves that we do understand. Shutting it away in some part of our judging hearts, forgetting that we do not know. We are quick to condemn the person who is not like us forgetting that God made each one different.

At work this evening I was saying how I'd heard somewhere (on the radio i think) that there were rumours that one of Mikey's kids may have vitiligo and about what a great fuck you it'll be for the people that doubted him. And my colleague said "that MJ self his own was too much" and I asked her that "who are you to judge?". And truly, who are you to judge? So what if he bleached? Will he have been the first person? Have you never bought a jar of Clear Essence? Have you never wanted to be something else? So what if he went under the knife? Gimme a break will you? I'd go under the knife right now if I could afford to. How could whatever he did to himself be so bad that you wont let it go? I'll never believe he assulted children, come hell or highwater so dont try to tell me that.

When I think of Mikey, I think about the time he won so many awards and people were screaming "we love you Michael" throughout his acceptance and he kept on saying " I love you too". I think about his amazing talent as a singer and as a performer. I think about his smile, the sadness on his face sometimes. I think about women fainting at his concerts. I think about his lithe skinny body. I think about his glove, his shoes and his crotch grab.

Today I remember Mikey the way I knew him. The man standing on his toes, knees bent forward, one arm in the air and a tendril of hair falling over one eye. And I reply, Yes Michael, I'll be there.

In my darkest hour, in my deepest despair, will you still care, will you be there

in my trials and my tribulations, throughout doubts and frustrations

in my violencce, in my turbulence, through my fear and my confessions

in my anguish and my pain, through my joy and my sorrow and the promise of another tomorrow

I'll never let you part, for you're always in my heart

RIP Gloved One